Marriage

I guess marriage is not what I used to picture it in my head when I was a kid. It's not what have been portrayed in the romance movies and dramas. It's not what have been written in the novels. It's not like what have been showed by the celebrities and influencers about how blissful and lovely their  marriage are, on social media.

Marriage is actually way more deeper and meaningful than that. 

Love.

I once think that we only get married to the person that we're in love with. The one that gets us head over heels all the time. 

But now, I learnt that, the so-called 'love' is not that important to start a marriage. Enough with just the willingness to stay committed to each other (and somewhat attraction is maybe necessary). And love will come later, when the commitment is nurtured with the care and toleration. 

Family.

I once think that marriage is such a bless when you're having another big family that will treat you like a family. (Eh?) Yep the family in-law. I used to think that it would be great to actually have another deep connection to a group of people.

But now, after having sisters and brothers in law in the family, and listening to experiences from my older siblings about their partner's family, I've change my mind. I almost forgot that every family has their own flaws and some might not be as beautiful as others. And so does my family. A sister/brother in law is still an outsider, somehow. I don't know about others but I couldn't treat them just like a close family member. It doesn't come natural to me. So I guess it happens to others too (?) That a new family member (what has been told by the law) is not the same like the one with blood-related. But in the end, you still need to accept and get use to that, no matter how awkward the process would be. And I believe, it would get better by time. 

Responsibility.

I once think that things will settle down and get in their ways once we're having a stable connection to someone. Like, we're sharing almost everything, then things should be just fine. No big deal.

But then, growing up I find myself disliking that. I don't like being dependant and sharing too much to someone. I don't like having responsibilities that coming in my way all the time. But then - nahh this points are absolute bs. This is the part of growing up -  of being an adult. That's how life is. Unavoidable. 

Above all, I think I should reconsider a few things before committing into a serious relationship. And I need to be mentally prepared for it. It's just a part of life timeline, and it may sounds so cliche but that just how life is - cliche.